Some Sundays you spend wrapped up in the world’s coziest blanket with freshly brewed, steaming coffee. The freezing rain patters off the roof and windows, the sound merging with the soft click of your needles. The rows softly growing from your hands. You catch up on Netflix and your favorite shows (Portlandia, for one!).
When you finally decide it’s time to take a break from knitting and do something else productive around the house, you find yourself procrastinating, searching for the perfect pair of colors of yarn for your next project-it’s time to learn brioche. This involves looking through endless Ravelry pattern pages, then completed project pages, then yarn options, then color options, then what other projects have been made with those colors, are they really the right colors for your project, and suddenly it’s been over an hour and no yarn has yet been decided upon or purchased.
At night you fall asleep, still pondering the perfect weight, brand, and color of yarns. Your brain swirls with yarns and snippets of memories from the day. You watched the Portlandia Noodle Monster epiosde about the tsukemen ramen noodle monster on the loose.
The noodle monster is terrorizing all of Portland and there’s nothing Tthehe mayor can do to stop it. Eventually they realize the only way to stop the noodle monster is to eat the entire thing. You wake up in the morning, your thoughts still foggy, and wonder…
What if your yarn stash came alive to terrorize your family and neigbhorhood, and the only way to stop it was to knit it into projects. Maybe a good reason to stick to that yarn diet? Naaahh, as I add the two perfect colors for my brioche project to my cart the next morning.